THE CITY OF WOMEN
With Marcello again?
Maestro, please...
Super buns!
You're stupendous
Gorgeous!
The woman I've always...
God, you're just too much!
Are you married?
Twice divorced. Why?
Oh, couldn't your husbands satisfy you?
Can you?
I'd be ready in a minute
We'll see...
Just keep still
You want to do it here?
What a chest you've got! Come here
We can always try
Where are we?
Fregene... It's my station!
- Wait. What's your phone number? - Good-bye!
She's not getting away
Where's that mount going?
Signora, the station's over there
What'll I do?
Let her go?
Look at that gait!
Good Ole Snaporaz can't let that go!
Signora!
Hold on a minute!
Taking pictures? Take a shot of my pecker
Careful, or I'll get you between two watermelons
You gorgeous cow
That was some kiss!
Like a shovel
You need a taste of Ole Snaporaz. Signora!
No, wait! Stop! Wait for me!
And now what...?
Alas, 'tis a divinity that guides us, Ole Snaporaz
Where're you taking that ass?
Here I am!
Signora...
There's an important matter
My train...
Where's that mare? There she is!
Wait, what's the hurry?
Slow down. Before you were so sweet, and now
- you're going away! - Not going away, going towards
Going towards what? Do you live here?
Ah, what a wonderful smell!
These trees use finer perfumes than your playmates
Are You married?
No. That is, yes. Only once. But I have no
"playmates"
We're alone: You and I...
Can't you slow down? Why the cross-country race?
Stop
Why do you follow?
What if I were going to meet a man?
Or many men... strong men?
It's a pity you lost your train for no reason
You're not afraid?
A little. But that excites me all the more
Give me a kiss, just one
Like you did before
Let me say it: You're a hot bitch!
You'd take on an army. What an ass!
It drives me crazy. Where's that kiss?
Not that kiss. Want a real one?
Quick...
Want me to eat you alive? Here? One condition...
If you close your eyes I'll give you a tremendous kiss!
No, be still. And keep your eyes closed!
Where'd she go?
No good bitch
With all my troubles I have to go...
and make a fool of myself
Who knows why I carry on like a silly boy?
At my age!
Now I'm stranded without provisions in a godforsaken forest
Ole Snaporaz
I dunno, boss
One and two! Two and three! Three and four!
Four and five!
Five hundred!
Five thousand!
Five hundred thousand!
Five million...
Five hundred million women!
Remove the furniture. It's rigid, obtuse
It's masculine!
Don't accept calls. Ladies, be reasonable, one at a time!
How come couples get rooms without identification?
There's my big bunny, honey-woney
You love me, don't you?
Well?
Nothing
Hello. Nice convention, huh?
Are you from the newspaper?
It's a wonder you got in. I'm from the newspaper too
I even wrote about our Convention in Heinzburgend
Have you been there?
"Nein", no men were there
Who can repair a tape recorder?
Nobody?
Can somebody fix a tape recorder?
Excuse me, sir...
Did a lady...
A female lady?
What a stupid question, that's all we've got
Keep your cool. She has boots and a Russian hat
He just walked in. He's right in front of me
Where are they going to practice group meditation?
Only one room?
Too many waves...
Come on, you. My recorder broke down
Everything's made of plastic
Ah, it's working?
You've just heard typical masculine sounds
Unbearable. They only suggest aggressiveness
There she is!
Out with the shit, Morning glory!
Now you'll hear delicate and harmonious sounds
Gentle and friendly
Humane, feminine sounds
Sounds of lacerated silks
Women working at their own pace
Here we have the turtle position
Practice this position for psychic stability
Hey, you...
You don't belong here
Go while the going's good
Talking to me?
What do you mean?
There she is... Signora!
I'm here!
The vagina is a shell with the sound of the sea
You all recall the song of the siren
But the male offends her
with humiliating names: Snatch, box, bunny
Beaver!
Patootie!
Let us explore this vagina of ours
with her lips, eternally kissing
Let's find new names
Tongue of light! Smile of life!
Moon-violet
The statues of Ancient Greece have phalluses
that rise up haughtily
Look at what phalluses have inspired
Where can you get that?
Wishful thinking
And so, phallic power
keeps oppressing half of humanity
That is, we women!
Even the missionary position is socially obsolete
What does he do?
The man, arrogant, with member erect on top of the woman with
her passive vagina
A sociocultural oppression,
from patriarchal times to the present day
We're against penetration. It's invasion without defense!
We want Ideal Coitus with parity between Male and Female
Penetration is a crime that should carry a fine of 10 million lira!
The Feminist Movement at Columbia University
- has been doing extensive research - They're reactionaries!
Fascists!
Stop right there. I've had it! You've busted my ovaries!
Let go!
Our main goal is to abolish fellatio!
A degrading practice from which we have never been weaned
I like fellatio
What's this fellatio?
Try reading Catullus!
It's only a subconscious manifestation of women's creativeness
Oh, finally...
The kitchen's far off
I'll take the tray. Go on, scram. Beat it
Cas-tra-tion! Cas-tra-tion...
The American woman
prefers the following position,
and naturally their husbands comply!
Why must it be a man and a woman?
There's no need for a man
Mas-tur-ba-tion! Mas-tur-ba-tion!
We've a thousand sensations in the palm
of our hand, in our armpit...
We must defeat fellatio, it's primitive!
Tahitian women have learned to keep
a turgid organ in their vagina for a whole night!
A feat unknown to us!
Finally I see two smiling faces among so many scowling women.
Why so bitter?
Yes, I understand feminism
but is the anger necessary?
The usual male commentary, huh?
Virgin yet whore, angelic yet diabolical
Goddess of the hearth and instrument of pleasure
Two aspects of false femininity to better serve
the male chauvinist pig!
"The Average Housewife"
Oh no, you're crying?
Marriage-Miscarriage!
Thank you, you were both marvelous
Marriage-Miscarriage... yes, excellent!
I agree
You're absolutely right
Yes, certainly!
There is Mrs. Small
jogging
in front of six husbands
All happy and content
Rare example of feminism inside the family circle
We're very lucky to obtain an interview
in her house
She says that when she was a little baby
the story of Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs
made a great impression on her
like a premonition of what her future would be
Her husbands
are of different nationalities
One is even Italian, from Naples
She went there to buy a dog but ended up marrying him!
Here is a final toast
with all the husbands
One moment! There's a big surprise
Our valorous comrade, Enderbreith Small
who was in my film
is here with us
You can ask questions to her
Aren't you a slave to 6 masters?
That's my question too!
Is she happy in her polyandric relationship?
She said very happy. It's a united family
Now I'll ask where her husbands are
Hans, Jenz, Jan, Giggi, Lars, Peter!
ALL WOMEN ARE BEAUTIFUL
Go on, go on... keep going
Don't stop
My dear sisters, I'm sixty
Only sixty!
Menopause doesn't exist
It's an alibi for the Male Society
It's he, the male, who runs out of steam!
I spent my life teaching children
And I found teaching them more rewarding
than having them
Look at this beautiful leg, see any seams or veins?
Wrinkles are a male invention!
My husband said: "You're like climbing the Everest
- without oxygen!" - I'm proud of my wrinkles!
Here they are, one by one
I've no fear of aging nor of dying
I adore life. Making love is marvelous
All women are young! All women are beautiful!
They're all only twenty years old!
A woman without a man
Is...
She's like a nose without a room
A somersault without any chowder
Like a dictionary without a broom
A parasol without any powder
A woman without a man is...
A palisade without a strut
A palimpsest without a sting
A pachyderm without a putt
A parabola without a sling
A woman without a man is...
A periscope without any greens
A pinnacle without a sigh
A pimpernel without any means
A pedigree without a thigh
I'd like to say something
though it may be useless, sisters
We've been deceived once again
Very subtly. True to his style
We were generous and hospitable
Understanding. We spoke
We discussed. We sang
We performed our rites
without reserve, or feminine modesty
in the futile hope of making known
to one who cannot, nor wishes to know
how much freedom, how much authenticity
and love, and life
has been denied us
Our efforts here have been useless, sisters
The eyes of that man, presently among us with that look
of feigned respectability, of one who desires to know us, understand us
because he insists that it can better our relationship
And of all of his hypocritical excuses,
this is surely the basest
Those eyes are the eyes of the male we've always known
They reflect his inner derision, his mockery
He has the same rotten core
We are only a pretext
for another of his crude, animalistic fables
Another neurotic song-and-dance act
We're his chorus, his hula girls, his fiends
We enhance his show with our passion
with our suffering
I warn this dismal, hollow, worn-out Sultan
that we're neither marionettes nor fiends
We're of this earth
but not as mere compost, as he would have us
He doesn't know us, nor wants to
and that is his fatal error
While we've been shut up in his harem
or isolated in our respective ghettos
we've had the time to study him
To observe this keeper of ours
Our Lord!
We know you well!
Everything about you. You're the marionette, the fiend!
Look at him!
He hides
You can't hide!
Your number is up
Look, I'll tell them everything, about the train and how you...
Look sisters!
In close-up!
Go to hell!
Attention!
A male
lurks among us, and listens to what we say
He steals our words. He records them
only to deform their meaning
He's a spy
We must stop him. Find him
Corner him. Throw him out
Excuse me...
Over there. That's him!
Out! Out! Out!
Ladies, please...
I came here by chance
Let me speak
Sir...
Come, follow me
What manners! You're all mad!
How was I supposed to know you were holding a convention?
Why pick on me?
What's so funny?
Why'd you call me? Let me out
Where are you going?
I wouldn't let him out
What does he want from us?
Instead I feel like helping him. I'm very maternal
I can't help it
It's my big weakness. Can you skate?
Skate? As a kid...
You've a chance then. Give him your skates
You must be brave and above all, lucky
- Are you lucky? - For what? Skating?
Where are we going?
That's Gabriella, every day, she circles the rink 300 times
She made a vow
Why don't we tell them
you're the new instructor?
He'll end up
like the plumber did
It'd be a pity
That thing's upstairs
Be careful when you open it
- Come, put the skates on - Where's the exit?
- You said you'd help me get out - In front of you
They're good, huh?
Must you go?
- How old are you? - Too old
Strike here, the male genital organs
You missed. You all miss!
You lack concentration
Concentration is everything
Keep mind on objective
Come, Camilla
Legs wide apart...
I got first prize for the best kick in the testicles
- It's bothersome, isn't it? - Oh no, it's a joy
Why are you here?
Strange, isn't it? I'm a chick full of contradictions
Ready for "Mackarij" kick... Go!
Good kick! Because good concentration
In your imaginative sphere you must visualize the genitals
Are you trying to rescue him, Donatella?
Lots of luck!
Come, grandpa
Hold on. It's thirty years since I've...
Don't be so nervous
I have a trick knee
You'll lead me to the exit, won't you?
You're such a dear...
Don't pull, I'll fall
Let go! I don't need you
Afraid, huh?
How beautiful!
They're good. Very choreographic
Shall I come and get you?
It's a madhouse!
Hurry, you fool!
- Come, Daddy... - A bunch of nitwits!
- Stop them! - They can't stop
We have to get through. Let us through!
Look out! There's a stair!
There's a stair...
The steps are slippery
You slip like an eel
My husband kept slipping
until he was kaputt
Come, little one...
Breathe together with me
Breathe and count: "Eins"...
Does it hurt?
Of course it does!
Cunts!
Look what a nice bronco!
I get such ideas...
I have to get back. Where's the station?
Station?
I'll take you
But "nicht so schnell", young fella
I can't make out what she says!
I won't touch you because I'll dirty you more
Good boy... Take your little coat and scarf
You see how black I am?
A bucket of water and I'm all white. Like a slice of bread
"Schon besser"? Feel better?
Let's go then. Move, young fella
Who'll ever believe this? If that bitch up there hadn't...
What time is it? Who knows?
Listen...
"And with his dipper He skimmed the pot
"Skim, skim, skim
"And now I scrub-scrub"
Where's the station?
Makes hot bubbles inside...
You men are so strange
You're all little cubs
You're a young fella too, a cub
"They all got fever-fever For my beaver-beaver
"Cool it, water, cool it, cool it"
"The same rotten core"
Oh, really, Madame? "He hasn't changed a bit..."
Why should he change?
To become what, instead?
I'm all yours...
Come, little cub. I'm ready
With my motorcycle we'll all be at the station in 10 minutes
Are you afraid?
I'm harmless
Except for one thing...
Just kidding. Don't be afraid for your thing
Hold on
Hold on tight. Tighter, tighter!
Signora, I took a different road this morning. There was no canal!
It's a short cut
Do you hear the frogs?
- They're singing - So who gives a damn?
How much longer will it take?
Almost there
We'll stop here
For just... sec-sec
What for?
The Stationmaster, poor thing
Signora, where're you going?
The Stationmaster's seeds. I promised him
This is too much!
Come, help me
Had I known...
Clever, Weisenheimer. You want everything easy
Help her how?
"There was a beaver who thought not of her beaver, poor thing
"She takes him to the station, but he denies her
"a helping hand for a few seeds"
This is ridiculous!
"Come, come, we'll gather seeds for all our needs"
It'll only take a second
Duck that nice head of yours
- What beautiful hair... - Yeah, thanks
These stuffed cats belong to my granddaughters
It's hot in here, huh?
Want a fresh egg? They're good for you
Puts lead in your pencil
Don't waste time, get the seeds and let's go
It's not time for seeds, silly cub
Look at this titty
Ever seen one so nice?
Oh, this is too much!
Signora, cover up...
Squeeze it for a sec then we'll go.
You know nothing about me
Don't say no. Touch it with a finger
just for a sec-sec
It's nice and firm
Yeah, it's firm, but let's go to the station
I've a cat down there that's purring
- And moaning - That's your business!
She's meowing. Come and stroke her
My big cat!
Take me to the station!
Are you crazy?
Let go!
I need it. Where are you?
Feed the cat. Feed it!
Don't oblige me to use force
My God, how it stinks!
Help! Help!
Gimme your little "knockwurst", gimme gimme!
You pig!
You sow!
It's my mother...
Mama, I only came here to get
some seeds
Seeds for the Stationmaster. The gentleman here
was helping...
You monster! Come out!
How could I give birth to such a monster?
Look what she did to you
I apologize on my knees for that filthy galoshe
That barge!
Out! Come out!
I'll come out, but no kicking, Mama. Swear!
You old toad!
You swore... you'll go to hell for that
Go home!
Shame!
She didn't do anything, really
I asked for some seeds
I'll fix her! Sweetie...
Accompany the gentleman
To the train station. And make sure you take the River Road
Forgive us
We're poor people. Long live Italy!
Yeah, long live
Wait! My coat...
Is it far?
They'll meet us
Who will?
Trudge, trudge The road will never budge
Where's Schizo?
She's going clean
She could be anywhere
- Who's that? - We're takin' him to the station
The car's already a bit overloaded
She's not comin'... doesn't feel good
Ugh... it's rippin' my guts
Can't breathe
What's she got?
Where'll I sit?
What are you doin', sittin' on the bottle with that ass...
Mommy struck again!
She screwed him...
She's something else!
Good-bye, Snow White
No, no way
"You turn me off", he says What? I turn you off?"
Then he says, "I can't score with you"
"You're wiped out, it's vice versa", I say
He blows my mind, I swear
They're comin'!
- Pussy ahead! - The San Vincenzo junkies!
She borrowed the car again. She's far out!
Put on some sound
What are you doing, you jerk?
Look out! Stop!
Who was that idiot?
Hey, how's Big Red makin' out?
He's still makin' out
Ciao, love... ciao, love
Ciao, lover...
Don't be ridiculous
You know what I got here? You don't know what I got
Relax...
There's nothing better to do
Come on, dance
The plane!
What are you doing? You're going backwards?
Stop!
Let go!
Asshole! Gimme back my gun
Monsters! You're all monsters!
Diabolical!
What are you?
Who's that jerk?
Well?
You think you can scare me?
What film is this?
Stop running, my good man!
Italo, Franz, Cleo... come!
Be good!
Enter...
I'll cover your retreat from those "lesbos"
How can female creatures stoop so low?
They're blanks, unfortunately
Only good for scaring them
It's three nights they keep me awake
with their shouting
their sit-ins
their Lesbo rallies
Although I'm busy with other matters at night!
But just knowing that they're
camped down outside my house, makes me furious
Come... No, wait
Let me see your face
Old pines fall down like this
Hollowed out.
It was a hundred years old
It toppled without warning
- But we'll never fall - Naturally...
You'll turn into repulsive old hags
before you'll see me topple!
Come in...
Thank you
Drugged, teenage girls tried to run me over
Typical
It's criminal, really
Have no fear. You're safe in my house
Come
And don't worry about my puppies
You like weapons? They're my passion
Guns, women, horses. Women first!
And women last too...
There's few of us left ever since the Invasion
Have you heard? They've threatened to demolish my house
Drink...
Look what they did to you!
Want some clean clothes?
No, I'll be going. They were supposed to take me to the station
- I'm sorry, we haven't met - Zuberkock, Dr. Zuberkock
Snaporaz, my pleasure
Sit down
By chance...
Weren't we schoolmates?
Wasn't it you...
I'd swear you were the one...
who could tie his dong at rest position
At rest?
It wasn't me
Turn that light on
Your father had a white streak of hair?
He was bald
Good answer. I'm happy you're here
This one?
Amazing...
- May I? - With your ear
Go on
It cost me a fortune
At a public auction, I had to outbid
a Jamaican millionaire.
It's better than Etruscan vases or Egyptian pots!
I've the finest "objets d'art" of the Orient and Europe
that honor the women and love!
You do love d'Annunzio?
Of course! Pardon, is the station nearby?
I dreamt of him. He said:
"Xavier..."
"Remember the greenhouses!"
What greenhouses?
Quiet!
You shall see, my friend
the splendor of my greenhouses
The most beautiful orchids in the world
with petals like flesh
It sounded like their patrol cycle
They come and go. Always checking!
Day and night!
Goddamn them!
What's this?
Ah, you remember!
I invented it while still in school. But the Japanese stole my idea
Typical
Automatic vibrators, 3000 r.p.m.
With this the woman goes crazy
She screeches like an eagle
It's paradise for her
Be still!
Let's see if you have the courage!
Come on!
I'd love to see you fry on the high-tension wires!
Or better still, impaled on the spires of the main gate
Unfortunately, I had them designed like phalluses
Grave mistake!
Yes...
My heart breaks when I think that my house, over 50 years old
almost built with my own hands and baptized "My Temple"
must be demolished
Dem-o-li-tion!
Dem-o-li-tion... Bitches!
Why demolition?
Laws decreed by our new rulers
Those hoodlum "lesbos"
They want a sick world
But they don't know me. I shoot!
I have guns, dogs, high-tension. And faithful friends
Yes, but I must...
I have a fortress here!
By Hercules, I must dress... for the party. Wait here
I can't stay...
I'll drive you back tomorrow, wherever you like
You have to see my orchids
3000 r.p.m.
How the hell does it stop?
Will you stop!
Idiot! You're gaining speed!
Quiet! Cool it
"Mother"
Let me dig him out
Find him with my own hands
Oh good God, what have you here?
What is it?
Let me dig him out Find him with...
Turn around how?
Like this? Is this good?
But I'll fall!
Ah, like that... like that!
Oh, yes, yes...
No... too much
That's enough
I beg you
Stop... stop
No, no, no... more! More! More!
You had enough orgasm. Now I want orgasm
A 15 minute orgasm
I want orgasm twice.
To "orgasm" or "orgasimize"?
To come
You had enough orgasm. Now I want orgasm...
Who are you?
Let's try here
I'll eat him!
Don't think so?
Your turn!
Oh, Mommy...
Mummy... Mother...
She was Ula Bula. She sang when she loved
Still more!
Look how many!
My dear friend, you're really extraordinary
How did you manage?
Want to hear them all together? The dear ladies?
Elena! You, in here?
Aren't you?
My train was stuck in the country
I wanted to phone
- I'd have called anyway - I was out
How come?
Isban Isbarashi!
Let us begin
We cannot disappoint our faithful friends
Beautiful lady, join the celebration
for my ten thousandth conquest
Everyone's waiting
Come...
You too, dear Snaporaz
Best wishes, Dr. Zuberkock
You find her beautiful?
Wait, my friends, before applauding
My sweet fiancee
would like to perform something for you
Concentration...
Impossible
Don't upset him
I'd do it for you, but I don't know how
- Do what? - You'll see
Music
Where will these gold pieces end up?
An Oriental art practiced by many courtesans
It's Zen-Sex
Want to try?
Another one
Silence
Give me your necklace
She does it with pearls too!
Are you happy? Happy now?
Ten thousand candles. I will try
All of them!
How about those?
Is he mad?
Swine!
No, it's not what you think!
Look here my friends
It was champagne!
D'Annunzio writes: "Oh, sinuous female forms
"coiled like the spirals of a white serpent
"Oh, maiden, how imperceptibly
"you turn the by-play of love into a surging fire
"Drink of me...
"I am the wine that inebriates"
Friends...
Amidst all this merrymaking,
I feel great sadness
'tis a bitter cake
Because you pissed on it, you slob!
It's not that...
Then why?
Because it's time to say farewell to women
All women
To the woman of the poet
The true woman
To my woman
At least tell me...
Only you can go to parties?
This lady also likes
to enjoy her liberty!
Thanks for showing me how!
Let's go away
I get depressed at home
I ran into my singing teacher
Excuse me, sir, but I'm talking to my psychoanalyst
Go right ahead, I'm not...
What are you doing here?
You vagabond!
Loredana
Look who's here!
Your button's coming loose
Come, I'll fix it
I'll be right here, Elena!
I keep everything in here
So I see
You're sweet, you remind me...
It's incredible
You're the spitting image of a showgirl who...
I'm her daughter
- She was my mother - There were two very pretty...
Yes, my aunt
The Smash Duo
The Smash Duo! What memories!
And you're a feminist?
Naturally
How could I not be?
Why do you come here?
That's a secret
You got yourself into a mess
I feel better. Want to talk?
No, thanks anyway
Tell me... Why am I in a mess?
Adieu woman!
Oh, what war, what peace, what land, what sea,
you were for me
Water and fire, all is desire
And when I pray
'tis you I implore
Adieu...
Eyes so imperious
Knees so mysterious
To you, I say adieu!
Adieu...
Oh navel so compelling
You were the dwelling
of my dying lips
Yes, I'm drinking.
My fifth. Or sixth or tenth
I don't know but I've no intention of stopping
What a bore you are
And yet your friends consider you witty
One who sees the brighter side of life
But did you ever force yourself to make me smile?
To make me a part of things, as a true friend?
Never!
It wouldn't hurt to try,
at least once, before everything turns to shit!
But he's too busy with crossword puzzles
and mystery stories, with his waistline,
his homeopathic cures, acupuncture...
Maybe a little puncture down there would do you good, huh?
How considerate you are
Listen, Elena, don't you...
Oh, sorry...
Remember when you used to place little notes under my pillow?
Did you love me then?
Did you?
Answer me!
Why do I even bother asking?
You never listen to me
He never once listened to me!
He's mum
Look at him
He won't talk
You shouldn't talk when you're like this!
Do you realize how empty my life is?
Has it ever dawned on you?
Was I ever able to talk about me
without you making a face or fidgeting?
What important exchange have we had in all these years?
None
Never!
Never anything!
Only when you're far away,
do you feel the need to call up, and chat
I'm your refuge
But I wasn't made for that!
I'm sorry, it's not enough!
You had your mother for that. I'm not your mother!
Quiet...
Must you do this to me?
Calm down, please
It's not as bad as you make it
You're exaggerating. We haven't come to such odds
We've been through difficult moments before
We'll grow old together
I won't leave you
You won't?
But I will!
Asshole
Grow old with you?
To be your nursemaid?
Tend to all your ills?
Clean your bedpans, and put up with your whims?
There's a fountain... you'll fall in!
I'm better off alone
Do you know what you've turned me into? I'm a nonentity
Do I still exist?
Go on, say it
that I don't exist
Don't you think I worry about our situation?
About shedding some light?
Let's not torture each other
Shed some light?
He wants to "shed light"
Then let's shed, sir
Shed away!
Silly, you don't know how to do it
There may still be a chance, if you wanted
Or are we too old to be young again, you and I?
The police! Police!
Wake up, Krisha. The police!
- Your Residence Permit? - A new gorilla?
Though my hearts brims with desire, I say...
Adieu!
Good evening, one and all!
Dr. Zuberkock, my respects
Forgive me for interrupting like this
but the owner of the house, illegally built
and subject to demolition,
is aware, correct me otherwise,
that all parties
must terminate at 11.30 p.m.
You've only a few minutes left
My beautiful Inspector,
your presence does honor my house
May I...?
At 8 am tomorrow you will report to Lt. Myrna
She wants to know why you fired upon
innocent schoolgirls this morning
Little cub! Identification, please!
What the...? You're a policewoman?
I shot in the air
I have witnesses
You're a little soft
What's this I feel that wriggles like an eel?
It's limp. It hangs at 6.30
Elena! My love!
Francesca!
Darling
I'll dress myself!
Now I make a report:
Why are you here? And when will you go away?
Another motorcycle ride?
You're guilty of mistreating minors
but thanks to Elena, we'll not arrest you
They were minors?
I'm guilty of having mistreated poor little girls?
Yes, little girls!
What have I signed, sweet enchantress?
The report concerning your dog's aggressiveness and subsequent death
Dr. Zuberkock, you know very well
you can't keep dogs like that
without special permission
One attacked a guard, and was killed
Ladies...
Our humble respects
I'm sorry, but the Stationmaster is better than you
They killed Italo!
The dog I loved most
Whores! Murderers!
Three of you for every dog killed!
Italo...
What harm did he ever do,
this faithful friend?
What's happening tonight, anyway?
I feel storms in my belly
Love is beautiful when it's storming
Right, Krisha?
Signorina, have you seen my wife anywhere?
I've seen many wives since I've worked for Dr. Zuberkock
A woman
in a red dress, seated there
The lady went to sleep. She's upstairs
Not so loud!
You see what they did to your boy?
My sweet Mommy...
You're my true love...
My little girl...
My sweetheart
Mamushka...
Good night. Sweet dreams,
my precious Mommy
Close all the lights
Close up everything
No one lives here anymore
I keep thinking
that our dear Xavier should get married
One needs a woman, my boy
A house should always have a woman
"A house without a woman",
they say in my parts,
"is like the sea without a Siren"
Don't you agree with me?
This was...
the nice surprise
that Dr. Xavier had prepared for you
Raina and Vessilas. Two darlings
You can begin
We're not ready!
Sit down, Signora
Sit down, sit!
We're here to applaud you
Look, my boy. They have skin
that glows
Come, they're dancing!
Fred Astaire
The lights went out!
It's better in the dark!
And that other song that went...
We're prettier by candlelight
You dance so well... Such class!
Remember?
My son,
the night has begun
And with each new night, the great journey begins
Do you know where I go every single night?
To him!
To my great, my one and only love!
Remember that actress, always wrapped in furs with sensuous lips?
Once we stole her poster from the movie house
and took turns each night. What royal jack-offs!
What a beautiful nightshirt
The Master's father slept in it, and his father before him
And tonight you'll sleep in it too
This was their room
Someone must always sleep here, or else they'll come
But with an onion by your side,
you will sleep till morning-tide
But I don't want to sleep!
"Peel the lady
"made of fruit"
"With 3 apples 'neath his bed The ugly voices took and fled"
"Dream of bliss And the Moon Maid's kiss"
Let's question him, girls!
Are you in love?
How old are you?
Own up, how old?
I hit fifty, but I'm still nifty
Go, Snaporaz!
He's off to a good start!
Listen to the wind,
and all the secrets it tells
Thank you, that'll do
Dream, dream, pretty boy
A great woman
weaves your destiny.
Dream of me, the prettiest who satisfies every whim
Good night, it's late
Look at me...
Good night, Daddy Longlegs. And remember:
"Shut your eyes right away"
"And heed not what the voices say"
Oh, we're stuck!
Choosing between you two
is no easy matter
Wait! Don't go yet
There's one little thing. Come closer
Good night
Listen...
It's important
What do you want?
I want to make love!
Make love!
But it's raining...
Quiet. We're guests
Shame!
Look what your whores have done to you
Well?
Well what?
You're dead!
I'm tired. I've been traveling
I thought we were separated
It's freezing up here
How much longer...?
There! He stuck his head out
Who are you? What are you doing here?
Hi there!
Hey, Snaporaz!
Rosina, Rosina, she quenches my thirst
The girl with the most, and also the first
It tickles!
I'll call your mother. Stop it!
I'm working
Want a good smack? You'll get it all right!
Come here
Look who's here!
Will you look who's here
Remember the lovely fishmonger?
Oh, how we sighed, how we cried
Take a look at this fish!
Eat my fish and you'll make love till you're a hundred
The fish lady from San Leo!
The eyes of a wildcat
Had I been a fish!
She was like a dream
In the dark, she was a shark!
Good-bye! Oh, the nurse...
from the health resort
Let me see the nurse
With all those teeth!
Feeling better today?
My little bube
became a big strong fella
I wanted to marry her
Imagine having a wife who carries you to bed
She was German.
What was your name?
The most breathtaking, spectacular
show ever offered to the public:
The Circle Of Death
You won't believe your eyes
You won't believe it's possible
And yet, look what we have here:
Lyonet!
The pride and joy of the U.S.A.
And Ginette Lamour! A Parisian thoroughbred!
They'll knock you dead
Matchless beauty, and unsurpassed
courage!
They risk their lives
in a terrifying Circle Of Death
Look Marcello, see what I see?
Remember? Way back in '23?
Wait for me!
Ooh la-la, ooh la-la,
Ooh la-la, the cinema!
The cinema!
Are you that sure of yourself?
Do you really think you can read a woman's heart?
It's too late, Ivan
The Ambassador has ordered my reentry. For me,
it's already winter!
The widow on the grave!
To whose ass I was a slave!
You're monotonous, dear Marcello
A woman, my good fellow, doesn't begin from behind
Behind, behind
Marcello,
remember that bordello?
The "assophile's delight". You became one overnight
An "Assophile", overnight!
Let's go, dear boys!
Dear joys...
Hop to...
...let's screw
...hop to
Let's go, dear boys
Hop to, let's screw, hop to!
...let's go, dear joys
Hop to, let's screw
Hey! Good-bye... farewell!
Get my coat, Adelina
It was cold up there
You're crazy
At our age one should stay at home!
The lights?
We finished ahead of time
Where're you going?
How'll I get down?
Don't break our gonads!
I'll close the cage!
You're so ridiculous! Ridiculous!
Listen...
Do you forgive me?
Poor thing...
PROGRESSENCE
Hello, I...
Hey, open up! Open!
Why pick on...?
Where am I?
This was the nicest part. Open up!
Let's take a look-see
He fainted. I knew it...
Could he be faking it?
Oh dear, he weighs a ton. He over-eats
He's too heavy, I'll crack my arm
He looks familiar
Hold him
For a minute I thought...
This one's much older!
Signora, I'll leave him here
Well?
Limp!
I told him:
Stay home, watch TV
Ricitelli, Achille, alias Ricky!
Tower 22! Ring number 7
Go to it, boys. Guts!
You're getting fat
I'll have to fine you
Honey, I called your wife and sister. I'll get your silk robe, right?
- You've been called. They're waiting - Why me? I'm no Latin lover
You tell her. Give me a minute, let me explain
No, I'm not going. Leave me!
I have to write to my wife!
To my mother! Let go!
Comrades! Help!
Why are you here?
You maintain...
that you lost your way?
Why didn't you go back?
Great! I even broke my glasses
What's the biological difference between male and female?
Have you ever known the real woman?
Why do you go prying
in a world that escapes you?
Why did you choose to be male?
Have you explored your feminine component?
Spadone, Roberto!
Officially registered: Male
Specific characteristics: Male. Hair: Male
At your service, Signor Roberto
I'll consign it immediately, don't worry
Keep it hanging, boys!
Good luck
Come back, Signor Roberto!
Where do they go? What's over there?
You tell him. Why do they go there?
To know the ideal woman
The woman of your dreams
That undiscovered lady
Describe your orgasm!
What is this?
I don't remember. Stop this nonsense!
Sorry, I really don't remember
How can I answer you?
I'm confused
Can't we end it here?
Let's... let's call it quits
Thanks for everything, and "arrivederci", huh?
Besides, it's cold here. I mean it was fun, but...
Hold your arm right out. Go on
Can't make it?
You're rickety. You've probably
never pointed out anything to anyone
Mention a woman's name!
Immediately! Don't think twice
I don't know... Pippo!
Pippo?
I said Pippo because... just like that
Don't ask me why
It's strange, I admit...
Ring number 4!
Mataluso, Sabino!
What? I don't understand
The charges!
Refuses to answer: Why are you here?"
Refuses to answer: "Why did you choose to be a male?"
Refuses to reveal
all he knows
He has no ready answers
He never gives, nor lends, nor trusts
He can't offer a woman true sexual fulfillment
He can neither define nor distinguish
his feminine component He repeats himself
He wears socks in bed
He's guilty of being aloof, self-indulgent
He pities himself
He can't find a way out
He's afraid of decisions. He's always mum
He's guilty of feeling guilty
Takes himself too seriously
He never visits his mother. He's guilty
of "maniacal assophilism"
He cannot commit himself to one woman
He loses his hair. He deceives himself
by imagining an ideal woman
He believes that woman are mentally inferior
He considers them superior beings
He prefers the dark side of the moon.
He can't justify
his aggressiveness, his vulgarity,
his arrogance towards women
He feels Ionely...
Don't kiss me. Keep away
This style's becoming
You're annoying!
You were so cute...
He can't cook
And he pees standing up
You're free. Go home
Well, aren't you happy?
He's surprised. You didn't expect it, huh?
Where'll you go?
Now that I'm free, I'd like to continue and see
what's beyond there
He wants to see. What a nut!
That's probably what you want me to do
Should I call up?
You were absolutely fantastic! He's done for, isn't he?
Yes, he's here
I'll tell him
I knew it! And now what?
I thank you for considering me worthy of this encounter!
Although it's a waste of time for me and you
Well? What do you want from me?
You don't like this head? Off it goes!
My eyes offend you? I won't look
Shake her. Break her
Find her. Lose her
Open her. Close her. Love her
Kill her. Remember her. Forget her
Go to her! Go to her!
Yes, I'm going
She's got to show up now!
We'll finally see this ideal which I say
doesn't exist
She's always just beyond,
always out of reach
She's ominous
A precision instrument
for pecker weights
What am I supposed to do up there?
Make love? With her?
It's profanity!
It'd be a calamity for me
if I found that she feels pleasure like the others do
He's really going up?
Poor guy!
Where am I going? I'll never make it
There's no air
It's a lifetime I've been up here
I could swear I hear a voice
A familiar voice
Hang in there, Ole Snaporaz. Go on
There's no turning back
If you existed, would you be my reward or punishment?
Please, let me go
Have mercy
Get me out of this mess. What good am I to you?
I don't need you, and vice versa
Could it be we've already met
but that I don't recognize you?
My first love?
No, you must be somebody new
Someone born out of me, as I was born out of...
Please...
I beg you, if you exist, if you are, show yourself
Now I need you. You must come forth
I will close my eyes
and count up to 7
After all, this can't go on
All right
When I open them, you'll appear...
near me
I'll start counting
Finally!
I was falling asleep
Good boy, you won!
Me too
because I was betting on you
See that? They're all going away
So that you may enjoy your triumph
There's the Grand Prize!
It was Dr. Xavier
who sent it to you. He's so fond of you!
Come! Come, my son!
Don't delay
Delay no longer. Hurry!
Come, come
Up there?
Yes, up there, little boy
The Great Woman, long dreamt
weaves a destiny of joy
Who are you?
What's eating you?
You've been mumbling and moaning for two hours
What's wrong?
Your glasses